I was born on the Aegean coast of Turkey, in the city of Izmir, in this life, surrounded by the scent of blooming flowers and the calming breeze of the sea.

My ancestry from my mother’s side was Greek/Italian and my father’s roots were Bosque Spanish, Central Asian Nomadic Turks and Arabic. My mother’s side had much war trauma and my father’s side had land displacement and poverty pains similarly.

So, The early parts of my life were hard. There was a lot of tension in the family, at age 5, my mother and father made the decision to divorce. Shortly after that, I was sexually abused for the next several years, along with many more pieces of early childhood trauma.

There a many layers to this story. I am feeling the desire to put some headlines of my story here for you to know: you don’t have to have had a great childhood or easy life to keep seeking freedom. Remember your true calling and mission is based in freedom.

Fast forwarding in my story, many other life twists and turns happened—continued family changes, political instability, and by the age of 14, I found myself in the unfamiliar new world of Columbus, Ohio.

From Columbus, Ohio, my journey continued to take me through different cities, a career in investment banking (which revealed the worst of human disconnection), a Master’s in Public Health, medical school, a pathology externship, and finally, a psychiatry residency.

During my medical training, I became physically and emotionally unwell. At first, I thought it was a personal health issue—something biological. I went through many medical and psychiatric work ups. I tried psychiatric medications and accepted diagnostic labels.

Over time, I came to see that the real problem wasn’t within me; it was the environment and the system itself. What was called “healthcare” often felt toxic, disconnected, and inhumane.

Each day felt like a contradiction—treatments that seemed more harmful than healing, a culture that dismissed human dignity, along with an expectation that I would conform to a system that didn’t align with my values.

By the time COVID broke out, I was in my 3rd year of psychiatric residency, but nothing felt aligned. I hated going to work everyday. I had become a mom by then and looking after my 6 month old. This mixed with the absolutely awful treatment of the public and the providers in the system during this time was all I needed to make the decision to leave.

This was the best decision I have made for my freedom, yet I had no idea what I would be doing with my life. I had no savings because I had been paying thousands of dollars to this education I had invested everything into, and had been not paid or underpaid for my services for years.

I didn’t care. I could feel the sweet freedom in my bones and I had the courage to trust myself, no matter what.

When you choose yourself and your audacious authentic flame, the universe conspires to make all of your dreams come true.

The steps I had to take were not easy at first, but I kept going. I knew I was choosing me no matter what. I took a 3 year long break from clinical care. During this time I dove hard into mothering, drawing, painting, meditation, nervous system regulation of all kinds, spiritual practices, breath work, yoga, chanting, singing, somatic care, moved into the forest, traveling when I could to natural bodies of realignment, various therapeutics, and started going through a holistic psychiatry fellowship with Free Range Psychiatry. 

In Costa Rica, I truly came into the embodiment of my feminine awakening - being surrounded by nature.

It was no coincidence that the year leading up to my time in Costa Rica I was consistently guided to "seek mother nature in her deepest place.”  I was shown in a few of my meditative visions, that after the long haul of healing work I was engaged with, I would then spend time in the womb of mother nature. In this void would be the final frequency realignment, that would mark the embodiment of the frequency. 

Making the decision to spend six months in Costa Rica was not easy for me. Anyone who has spent enough time in this location knows the level of wild strength that resides there is unlike anything else.

It is very common knowledge for anyone who spent an extended amount of time there that, this is a place that either you surrender to and receive immense healing from through the surrender, or you follow your egoic frames and get spit out in the most harsh ways possible.

So it took me two trips before my move out there for me to really feel out the frequency and start to align myself, so my passage would be as gentle as possible, given that I was going there with my 6 year old child, alone.

After my initial smaller trips there, I was fully aware of Mother's Wild strength. I was full time in practice of surrender and allowing all that needed to die. This was a 1.5 year long journey of death after which I arrived in her womb for an extended period to allow for the remembrance of the feminine awakening frequency embodiment.

Even so, the first two months of my time there was again tremendous death and cleaning out of my psycho/spirit and vessel. I am forever grateful she accepted me and guided me in the gentle firmness of the most nurturing mother.

On my journey to Costa Rica, one of the reads I brought with me was, Witches, Midwives & Nurses: A History of Women Healers by Barbara Ehrenreich and Deirdre English. I had read this gem a few times but somehow I knew I needed to read it again.

Once I landed on the word “Doctress” my 3rd time around, I knew why I brought this along with me now. As I was remembering and embodying my feminine, it was no surprise that I was ready to shift my egoic identity from a Doctor to a Doctress.

To get to this transformation, one of the first steps that had taken place several years back was to drop the identity of the “savior “and the identity of the “all-knowing patriarchal superior.” I dropped the savior paradigm way before I knew what would replace this.

Now in the middle of my feminine embodiment, the Doctress emerged. The intuitive being that connects to the cycles, elements and the unseen realm and guides with inner knowing rather than any form of cognitive superiority. 

I can now clearly say, Doctress is my role through and through. I know because I am connected to truth and in that connection I am guided in truth based service. 

Here it is important for me to highlight that this is by no means a rejection of my medical background and my identity as a physician. 

Being a physician is a big part of my mission. I would be steering away from truth and wholeness if I rejected all my medical knowledge and capabilities I have gathered over the years.

When you think about the history of physicians, they were enthralled with life—what does it mean to be a human and connect all these patterns. There were pillars of society and applied unrelated pieces together, because it is all connected and we are one.

I don’t want to discard any part of me, because there is no freedom in that. True freedom lies in acknowledging, accepting, and celebrating all my parts.

Why can’t I be a prescribing MD and a Doctress, and a mother, and an artist, and a frequency healer, and a dancer, and a singer and many others?

Wholistic—holding space for all the things that I am, versus putting myself in silos. That’s freedom. A mission is all encompassing, and we need different skill sets, different parts to fulfill that mission at different points of that mission. 

So in embodying myself in my wholeness, I invite you to explore and embody yourself in your wholeness.